Pasupatidasi's Blog

thoughts, poetry, life as it is…

change comes

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it has been a year since my beautiful child has been living as the girl she is. the changes that have come have not been hers really.

oh, her hair has grown out and frames the heart shaped face that holds her smiling eyes.

the wardrobe is different too, dresses with leggings underneath. but the colors she’s always chosen to wear haven’t changed: black and purple, stripes and skulls. (she’s so halloween!)

the games she chooses for the wii system or computer haven’t changed either.

but the people around her have had to change.

my mom still struggles with using the appropriate pronoun when referring to her. but she realised that zeeona (the new name she’s chosen) would wear dresses when we came out to visit.

the cousin that had betrayed her trust by laughing at her in public for wearing a dress now plays with zeeona and shedoes use the appropriate pronoun. they play now as they always had before the ‘nasty betrayal’…like two good friends, two girls.

i have perhaps had to change the most, yet for me it was the easiest of changes i have ever made. i merely had to believe in her. then the rest fell right into place.

i feel like celebrating this anniversary. but not with her. zeeona has always said she was a girl, so there’s nothing to celebrate from her point of view.

but i will celebrate, quietly, and with great joy. i will celebrate the world around her changing to accomodate her, lovingly, as she goes about simply being herself!

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