its great to awaken in a state of gratitude! it is, in and of itself, a blessing ~ since some people have a much harder go of their emotional and/or mental life. (like ziona, for example)
i don’t know when it was that this state of grace befell me. it goes back many more years than the births of either of my grown daughters. it had fortunately been in place long before ziona came into my life, carrying along all of the special ‘othernesses’ and difficulties with which she is equipped.
this grace has helped me to rise to any and all occasions, regardless of depth or scope. it has revealed to me the bright side in every hell, in each trouble. with it, came an ability to see beyond the immediate and visible reality, projecting likely and alternative outcomes or perceptions onto whatsoever circumstance should present. it has granted me as well an ‘eye in the center of the hurricane’ sort of calm.
it would be flattering to myself to be able to attribute this boon to some feat i have accomplished, or some faithful and daily ritual performed such as yoga or sitting meditation. it would be wonderful if i could point to some trauma, or some transcendent religious or spiritual experience as the source of this mindset of gratitude, if only to explain why i should be so endowed while others seem not to be.
moreover, it might justify why such a loathesome and lowly creature as i am (no false humility or overstating of the facts here, anyone who knew the particulars of my life story, inside and out would use similar adjectives) has been granted such an auspicious benefit.
i wish i could point everyone i know, and even those i’ve not met, toward some faith or tradition, toward some religion or ascended master ~ something, (anything!) so that all they who seem not to be in possession of this blessing might attain it. i wish i could reach inside of people and flip some invisible switch that would turn it on.
the simple fact of the matter is that there is no magickal formula, no daily practice, no penance or shining good deed done to account for the grateful heart. there is nothing that one must ‘do’ but rather it is that one must ‘undo’.
a cup that is full, no matter with what, cannot be added unto. an empty vessel can receive much. it is only the drum that is hollow that beats strong as a heart. the fulness of a flute’s tone relies on the unhindered flow of the breath. the space between drumbeats creates rhythm. in the space between thoughts there is heaven.
undoing, making room at the inn, letting go…
perhaps poetry and aphorisms are the only way to explain the means through which gratefulness of spirit comes to reside in one’s heart. and perhaps only poetry can describe the benefits. but as the new year begins, as we move further into the age of aquarius and the time of the fifth sun of the mayans, it is my most fervent wish that folk the world over and in every estate, unfurl within themselves this gift. one which everyone already has…but have yet to unwrap and enjoy.