Pasupatidasi's Blog

thoughts, poetry, life as it is…


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here we go

the parts of the christmas meal i am to bring are done, with the exception of the bread which i will make and bring while hot…

zion is bathing before donning the beautiful purple and black dress she has chosen for today…i have chosen my t-shirt that announces “my kid is transgender…if that’s a problem, get some help”

i don’t wear this to be provocative, but as a means to do away with any unnecessary and unwanted dialog concerning the fact of zion dressing as the girl she is.

my family tend to be less than aware on issues like gender, sexual preference and such things.  but as christmas gathering is not the place for them to debate the issue, i decided that a simple and strongly worded statement in support of my trans-daughter was the better part of wisdom.

otherwise, i’m convinced that someone would feel it ‘their place’ to bring up the subject along with all the opinions they undoubtedly have with regard to zion’s reality.

ah, families!

i have a friend of many years, a gay man, whose mormon parents and family make it so uneasy for him to come and visit for thanksgiving, his birthday or christmas that he simply won’t go…he and i conspire to keep him ‘previously engaged’  for thanksgiving/birthday by purposely planning our ‘together travels’  for that time.  that’s how much love he feels from his family.

it is a sad state of affairs that some families can only make their own members feel welcome if those members either be who the family wants/expects them to be or hide who they are.

it makes me sad to think of all of the people like zion whose families have totally severed ties with them because their minds can’t wrap around the notion of transgender.

so i will wear the t-shirt, which zion loves. because knowing my family…they won’t dare to say anything if i do.

 

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make my day

well it is nearly that time of year when my family gets together at mom’s house.

presents under the tree, smells of too much food wafting about, great grandchildren underfoot waiting to open gifts…

i’m not much of a people person, even when the people are my family.

as the oldest of seven, with fiftyfive years under my belt, and a tendency to be overtly honest as well as terrible at suffering fools, this year, being the first with zion openly a girl, there is a lot of ambiguity toward this gathering.

my mother understands by now that i won’t tell zion that she can’t wear one of her new sweater dresses to grandma’s.

she knows by now that every time she refers to zion with a male pronoun, i will correct her by supplying the female one in it’s place.

actually, my mom…with seventyfive years under her belt, has been pretty darned good about accepting that which she readily admits she doesn’t understand.

it is the others expected to be in attendance that may try to make things into controversy.

in advance of this eventuality, i am wearing my new  favorite long sleeved t-shirt..

.it reads:
‘my kid is transgender……if that’s a problem

GET SOME HELP!’
(zion loves this shirt!)

people who know me already understand that unless they want to lose, it is best not to pick a fight with me

,…about anything!

so, altho the usual loathing of crowds, even if they are my family, is firmly in place…i will attend, with an ‘i dare you’ attitude that says:

‘go ahead…make my day!’